the new adventures of sherlock holmes

sherlock you have a mortage you're depressed you put your pipe down and now you don't pick it up. you went to the aquarium and cried into some baleen

eat

put it in your digest road send it off it's nothing to you? but other corn hash? a moral question.

death is coming

jk it's your mother your mother hates you and she's coming to tell you that she hates you asshole

turd welder

a business passed from my grandfather to my father, my father to me, and now it is my duty to make sure that what you pass can be turned into any of a variety of useful money saving devices. make a rope of turd, cordon off sections of your street and scream for hours in the middle of the road. create a superstructure for a grand project with your waste and then let me wait in the wings as your whole ill-conceived business empire crumbles around you

time to go camping kids

ive got on my militaristic brown shorts. legs like 4x4s, knees like draped burritos. a charmer in my youth don't you know ok into the windstar. later you'll defecate in a hole under my direction and i'll refer to your labored excreting as a 'spirit quest.' share my good humor or be rolled